The Point Is...

So I'm currently taking a world literature class and we've been talking about the bible (Hebrew Bible) a lot. We especially have been talking about what all the stories of the Book of Genesis really mean.

I'm assuming we all know the story of Adam and Eve....
God's first humans who he gave everything to. Everything except the knowledge of Good and Evil anyway, which was displayed in the form of fruit on a forbidden tree.

Long story short, Adam and Eve eat the fruit and God punishes them and their descendants (which I suppose are us). He says to Eve "I will terribly sharpen your birth pangs, in pain shall you bear children. And for your man shall be your longing, and he shall rule over you." 

Now Idk what's real or false. I'm religious but I don't believe everything. I as a woman have terrible menstrual pains and I am aware that child birth hurts like a mofo. The man thing tho... 

What the hell? Why? 

I don't even think I fully understand what that means really... yet I feel like my experience with love can be summed up a bit by those words.  In a sense that, this person has ruled my thoughts many a night and day. Many things I want to do simply for this person's happiness and well being. This person's ability to hurt as well as uplift me is unlike any thing I've experienced before. Even if a gun can kill me at least my suffering ends. This person could kill pieces of me but I'd live to feel death for the rest of my life. 

I'm supposed to be studying these passages right now. But i'll be tested on facts. 
I do not care about facts.... 
I don't care that THIS happened. 
I want to know why and how it happened. 
I believe that there are things in the bible that are....true but not literal. 
I'm sure you do too...

I digress.

I have long since my days of first communion Sunday classes accepted that my life is predisposed to be difficult because of some un...understandable...oversittable force and nothing will stop or alleviate that pain. Only make it worse from time to time until I stop caring. 

I was once told that those who do not care will burn. 
'Faith' just might be scarier than the lack there of. 

All day I've been thinking about how little I can really do to...fix life. It's supposed to be flawed. 
I've been thinking that there is no decision with no cons. And choosing the decision with less cons won't always make me happy. 
Weird right? Logically it should but it doesn't...it's easier but... I don't know

I can only hope that I make decisions confidently.

Kinda ready to just say what I want and then roll with whoever or whatever rolls with that. 

You wanna know something weird? 
Whenever I have important things to do my fingers can't get off these keys but as soon as my schedule clears up... I forget how to type and my mind closes right back up. 

I have the wrong textbook so I can't do my work right now. Which means I can now write with no stress or hindrances. 

Only, I didn't have those before and I feel like I do now. 

This was originally supposed to be a poem meant to decorate the walls of this tacky website but now here we are coming to the close of one of the thousands of thoughts competing in a track meet in my mind. 

See you next time I have a test to study for.

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